A couple of years ago, while I was the Youth Pastor, I had a mom come to me and plead with me to fix her daughters. She had two daughters who were both… let’s just say… their moral compass was not pointing north. As she sat in my office complaining to me about her daughters, how they never listen, how they were into this and that… She had a tone that led me to think it was somehow my responsibility to make them Holy. (As a side note her daughters came to youth/church once or twice a month.)
I could tell in her voice that she was desperate, and after 10 minutes of listening to her spew, I finally had to ask her to stop so I could ask a question, to which I already knew the answer. “Do you go to church?”… I could tell that my question put her on her heels. “No..” she replied, “but I watch Christian TV.”
I calmly told her that her daughters meant a great deal to me, however, there was very little I could do for them. She looked at me like a deer in headlights. I continued to tell her that if she wanted to “fix” her daughters she needed to set the example and be submitted to a pastor. I told her that she should not expect me to fix her daughter if she was not committed to it. I went on to say that I could preach holiness and purity all day long but, as long as she permitted her daughters to dress the way they did she was voiding the very thing she wanted fixed. You can imagine that this was not the response she wanted. I prayed for her and told her that I would continue to do what I could, however she needed to consider making some changes.
As she left, my heart was saddened, I knew that she was not willing to make the changes. As the parent she was not willing to take responsibility for herself or her children. When God told Adam and Eve to be fruitful and multiply He gave humans the ability to reproduce, the responsibility as parents to raise a child in the way that they should go, and the authority to be the leaders of their house.
When I was a child, the rule was, “As long as you live under my roof you will be in church!” I didn’t have an option. When the doors of the church were open we were there. Think about it for a second.. out of 168 hrs in a week, 56 hrs will be spent sleeping, 21+hrs in front of the tv, 30hrs in school, 5hrs on homework, 2hrs in church (one service a week) and the rest (54hrs) with friends, on the internet etc.. being influenced by the world. Spending 2hrs in church a week is just over 1%.
As a parent, I encourage you to walk in the authority that God has given you. Make time at home to read the bible and pray together. Get your children to church when the doors are open and get them around youth pastors and leaders. By doing so, we decrease the amount of time the world influences our children and increase the time God influences them.
Come on! Preach that…. oh…you just did. Sweet! It's so true though. As adults and even young people, we all have a responsibility to lead people we have influence over. It's funny that at work so often I find my self taking the lead and managing people and tasks. I'm not a natural leader, it's not my gifting to be a leader to the masses. But everyone is called to be a leader to someone. And God is able to equip you with the skills that don't come so naturally.
AMEN!!!!! You couldn't say it any better. You are so right Pastor Rory. I was talking about this very thing with someone today. It is time for Parents and the Church to unite together and raise this generation. NO ONE can do it on their own. They both need one another.
SO TRUE! Our kids know that we go to church every time the doors are open and it's not an option. Thank you for this post. It got me thinking…
We also have the responsibility as parents and leaders to influence our children every chance we get. I was thinking of all the lame excuses people had for not going to the United Concert because it was far away and on a work night, they need sleep, blah blah blah.
Nothing was going to hold Roger and I from getting our kids into an atmosphere of worship. Of course we LOVE Hillsong United but more importantly, I want my boys jumping up and down with 20,000 other people of all ages crazy for Christ. Yes, I am still tired from not having a full night of sleep. Yes, it took over 2.5 hours to get there and we all almost wet our pants in the horrible traffic. Yes, Jayce HAD to have a $25 t-shirt. Wow. My kid wants a Christian band t-shirt to wear. Are you sure you just want one? Yes, Rog and I will do whatever it takes to expose this generation to the life God has for them. We have to join together with the churches in this valley, state, and nation. It's going to take all of us.